How An Absent Mother Affects Children
When it comes to child development, an absent mother is not a trivial issue. In this article, we will take an in-depth look at what can happen in such a situation.
From the beginning of a child’s life, the mother is the most important attachment figure. When a mother is not around in the baby’s life, it can have major consequences.
A child’s overall development is built on several aspects, from their physical needs to their emotional life. The relationship between a child and their mother or father is an important part of their mental and emotional development.
A parent may be absent due to many different reasons, some of them may be tragic. Not all children are lucky enough to grow up with a mother.
In other cases, she is not able to spend enough time with her child, whether it is due to work, breakdown or other factors.
What a mother gives her child
When we think of motherhood, the first thing we think of is: protection. There is a good reason for that.
A mother is the person who brings us into this world and who nurtures and cares for us from the beginning. The ribbon is an indispensable part of human existence.
As we grow older, our mother will always be there to comfort us when we are sad. She is there to calm us down, make us relax and encourage us and make our fears disappear. When we are nervous, scared, angry or in pain, she is the person we seek for support.
An absent mother can therefore lead to deep insecurity for the child. This is especially the case when other adults in the child’s life do not take responsibility in such a situation.
This is a case where the support of a professional counselor is indispensable.
Consequences of an absent mother
From the beginning of the child’s life, their mother is their most important attachment figure.
- Negative emotions. The child may experience loneliness or worthlessness as they do not receive the care and attention they need. It can lead to anger and frustration.
- Bad behaviour. This includes not responding to the things they are told, making unreasonable demands as well as harming themselves and others. In other words, the child may appear to be in a constant bad mood. These are common responses to the absence or loss of a parent or role model. Patience and love are essential when it comes to helping children who are going through such a phase.
- Problems with social conditions. In the same way, the child’s other social conditions can be harmed. Whether it is because of a lack of trust, or because they have not yet learned the necessary social qualities. Children with an absent mother figure have a problem with attachment to others. They can also develop an addiction to the people who are there for them.
- Emotional imbalance. It means irritation, low self-esteem, depression, anxiety, lack of motivation and more.
- Health problems. Unlike the loss of their mother, some children may lose their appetite. Along with the emotional issues described above, this can lead to problems with the baby’s physical health. This should be taken care of immediately by a professional.
How to help a child, with an absent mother
Despite all of the above, there are still some tips on how to help a child deal with the loss or absence of their mother and its aftermath.
Here are some tips for parents or guardians:
- Become their mother figure. Although far from easy, a father or other guardian can fill this role as a mother or father. Tact, understanding and are important, but can be a good solution for everyone involved.
- Find a replacement. With the help of aunts, grandparents or other close family members, you can find someone who can fill the role of mother. As in previous cases, it is important not to force a relationship. The bond needs to be created gradually with trust and love.
- Explain the situation to them. The truth will always come out. Tell your child why their mother is not in their life. Sooner or later, they need to be told.
If the child’s mother is not completely absent, but e.g. working far from home, the situation can be much easier to resolve.
Many studies have shown that the quality of part-time work is much more important than the time spent together.
It is important to give your child full attention whenever you can. Remember that these moments help significantly.
What you do together is less important, whether it’s play, go for a walk, or help with homework. As long as you spend time together, it can help them feel valuable and helped.
Children understand when their mother shows interest in them, loves them and gives them support. It is this day-to-day presence that is important for their development.