I’m Your Parent, I’m Not Your Servant

All children, meanwhile, have a tantrum. Kicks, screams, crying and moaning are all common things in childhood. But I’m not your servant. I’m your parent.

Many parents respond to this behavior by giving their children everything they want. Mothers and fathers believe that by doing this they will reassure their children. Unfortunately, this is wrong in the long run. This can make children think of their parents as a servant who has to take into account their behavior all the time.

Society demands more and more from parents and children. We sell a false idea of ​​the perfect job, a healthy economy and of course the ideal family life.

In an effort to live up to this, parents push their children into an infinite number of activities from an early age. When this happens, children do not have enough time to get bored, or just discover themselves.

The competitiveness that pushes adults to get ahead of their peers can often affect children as well. Parents are focusing more and more on their child’s academic performance than on giving them a good education with balance, respect and time to play.

I’m not your servant

With this in mind, it is important to understand why children need time to do nothing. They have to get bored, think and play. They must learn to fall and get up.

Children do not need their parents to pay attention to them all the time. In fact, it is necessary to have time where one is sad for their emotional and cognitive development, it helps them face different situations for the rest of their lives.

In this era of technology and competitiveness, many parents want to make everything easy for their children.

Fear of causing trauma causes these mothers and fathers to do things they do not want to do. They do their children’s homework, or give them just what they want.

They do not give their children responsibility of any kind.

By treating our children this way, we can make them believe that it also works that way in the real world. We teach them that if they make a tantrum, others will give them what they want.

They risk becoming  toxic people,  pushing the people closest to them away.

They will not be able to establish healthy relationships because they do not know how to identify them.

What can we do to avoid this?

There are several things you can do to tell your child, “I am not your servant.” In the beginning, it can be difficult.

Many parents are afraid that their children will grow up. Seeing them become more independent and start doing things on their own can cause nostalgia and sadness.

Despite this, we need to think about what is best for the child.

Talk to your child

But do not try to do it during a tantrum.  Your child will not listen if they scream and cry. Wait until they relax, then talk to them.

Tell your child, kindly but firmly, that you will not tolerate this bad behavior. If they continue to act like that, no one will play with them.

Change “to be” to “to do”

During an outbreak, many parents accuse their children of being bad. This is very negative, and if you keep repeating it, it can lead to problems. Therefore, emphasize the following: “I am not your servant”.

Instead of telling your son or daughter that they are “bad”, say, “What you did here was bad.”  It is their behavior that is unacceptable, not them.

Give them responsibility

Teach your child to do housework. Depending on their age, there are things they can learn to do. This will help them become self-sufficient and feel useful.

The sooner they learn to participate, the more they will do. Helping at home is always beneficial.

Do not demand too much.

Remember that your son or daughter is still a child. It is not now that they have to face all the problems of the adult world.

Instead  , they need to have time to play and relax. Otherwise, they are more likely to suffer from ailments associated with stress and anxiety.

Let them express their feelings

Emotions are not bad. Learning to control emotions is an important part of a child’s upbringing. Teach them to express sadness, joy, and dissatisfaction.

But do not forget to show your child how to do it respectfully, without shouting or insulting others. Here you can also mention: “I am not your servant”.